From Happiness to Meaning: The Mindset Shift Psychologists Advise
Therapies like Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and the science of eudaimonia provide a practical path forward. The approach involves clarifying your values and taking committed action while allowing space for uncomfortable emotions instead of fighting against them. You can do what matters to you without feeling good first. This method may seem less appealing than chasing happiness but it delivers more reliable satisfaction over time. The mindset works in three parts. First you accept your internal emotional state as it is. Second you choose directions that align with your values. Third you build psychological flexibility so you can keep moving forward even when your inner critic speaks up. Clients I have interviewed report that this approach makes them feel steadier rather than happier. That steadiness turns out to be more valuable than most people realize.
| Mindset | Primary Focus | Typical Behaviours | Short-Term Effects | Long-Term Outcomes |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Hedonic (Chasing Happiness) | Maximise pleasant feelings | Constant optimisation, comparison | Brief highs; fragile mood | Plateau, avoidance of discomfort |
| Eudaimonic (Pursuing Meaning) | Live values; contribute | Purposeful routines; service | Mixed feelings; solid progress | Resilience, fulfilment, connection |
Practices That Build a More Satisfying Life
Start by mapping your values. Choose three areas like work relationships & health. Write one sentence for each area that describes how you want to act. Remember that values are actions like “be curious with clients” rather than goals like “get promoted”. After that create small practical actions that match those behaviors. Ask two meaningful questions to clients each day. Plan a date night every week. Take a twenty-minute walk after lunch. When you repeat small actions that align with your values they build up into something meaningful over time. Include a five-minute acceptance exercise in your routine. Name the difficult emotion you feel and rate how strong it is. Then continue with your planned action regardless of how you feel. This breaks the incorrect belief that you need to feel good before you can take action.
Guardrails provide structure and support. You should schedule regular connection through calls with friends. Set aside time for mastery by creating learning slots. Make room for contribution through mentoring and volunteering activities. In my research I found that professionals who build their weeks around these three pillars consistently report more stable satisfaction levels. This stands in contrast to those who constantly pursue new pleasures & experiences. To understand why chasing novelty does not always produce better results you need to consider the trade-offs involved. People who jump from one exciting activity to another often feel a temporary high followed by a return to baseline happiness. Meanwhile those who maintain steady practices in connection mastery and contribution develop a more reliable sense of fulfillment over time. The difference comes down to sustainability. Novel pleasures require constant escalation to maintain the same level of excitement. Regular meaningful activities build cumulative value through repetition and depth. When you call the same friends regularly you strengthen those bonds. When you practice a skill consistently you see measurable progress. When you contribute to the same cause repeatedly you witness real impact. This framework does not eliminate spontaneity or fun. It simply provides a foundation that prevents the exhausting cycle of seeking the next thrill. You can still enjoy new experiences but they become additions to a stable base rather than the entire strategy for happiness.
- Pros of chasing happiness: fun, novelty, quick relief.
- Cons of chasing happiness: adaptation, pressure to “feel good,” avoidance of growth pain.
- Pros of pursuing meaning: coherence, resilience, deeper ties.
- Cons of pursuing meaning: discomfort, slower pay-off, fewer instant highs.
Discomfort does not mean you are failing. It usually means you are doing something important. I ask sources two questions. The first is what would your future self thank you for. The second is what would you still choose even if it did not make you happier right away. The answers usually show the next right step.
